A Lot of Nothing

How the heck has everyone been? I know I have been slacking on the whole blogging thing, which I know is really letting my dedicated fans down. Shelby has about 5 posts to one of mine. But whatever I’ll try and do better. Well, school registration started um… YESTERDAY. Yeah, I still have no idea what I want to do with my life. At times I am interested in everything but then at others I don’t care about anything. But maybe it will come to me in the next few hours. But on the bright side of things I get to move out of this hell hole in August. I actually really love my apartment I just REALLY don’t like my roommate. I seriously cannot wait to be away from her. I will definitely be throwing a celebration. Question is though, where will I be living next? I guess I don’t care just as long as I am not living with a psycho anymore. And if anyone is thinking I am being too harsh, you obviously don't know her...........

ANYWAYS… other than that nothing exciting has been going on in my life (not that that was exciting). I went to Auburn a few weekends ago with some of my friends to celebrate my friend Holly’s 21^st birthday, well, and to see my cousin of course. It was nice to get away. Maybe eventually I can be there for good. Well not for good but a little while at least.

My nephew turned THREE a couple of weeks ago. He is seriously the cutest thing ever. The other day we tried to get him to say helicopter because there was one in the sky and he called it an “appledoctor”. He also showed me how to use a fork the other day because apparently just because I don’t like to eat chicken nuggets with a fork means I don’t know how to use one. He definitely gets that from his great-grandmother.

Weekend Shenanigans

WELL. This weekend one of my and Clayton's friends got married... Well technically I guess you could say it's two of our friends because the groom is a friend of ours also, but mainly the bride... is the point I'm getting at. Anyway, let me tell you, the 5 hour drive to Knoxville, which consisted entirely of interstate, was well worth it all:

From the beautiful scenery 

To the beautiful people.

       We also stopped at "the biggest Flea market" in Sweetwater, TN... the most awesome place on earth. Clayton and I got some Hunter rain boots for 30$ along with some Johnny Cash memorabilia (i.e. 2 t-shirts and an original concert poster), almost gave into my attraction to pocket knives (they were only 15$!!!), and were momentarily debilitated by tantalizing kiosks lined with cages full of puppies and signs reading "Do not touch!" as if to say "Look... the only way you're going to get to touch one of these adorable puppies is if you buy one."... On the way out, we noticed a kiosk with a plethora of reading glasses from the 80s and decided to try on a few pairs. I'm pretty sure I found the exact pair my dad has...

FYI: The tiny sign above that
pair of glasses says "New Style"

      For this next recap you're going to have to use your imagination as I do not have any visual aids in the form of pictures to document it. So sorry.... Anyway, also on the way home, we were inadvertently caravanning with some of our newly made friends (they wooed us with their dancing) after a brunch at the Cracker Barrel (or as I like to refer to it, Crackel Barrel) in Chattanooga, when all of the sudden I see a vaguely familiar, white, mid-sized sedan creeping up beside mine at 80 mph on the interstate. So, Clayton and I look to our left to send some spontaneous gesture to our new boyfriends, and instead, find that they (being boys, from Mars or wherever) were not surprisingly on a completely different page. They had contrived another means of communication in the form of a hand-made sign plastered to their passenger's side window that reads "LEFT LANE ALWAYS."...
This just validated my deeply subconscious suspicions that this was a race. Oh, it's on little boys... it's on. Needless to say, my innately superior driving skills quickly pulled us back into first place, leaving the Tokyo Drift team in the dust... for a little while, until I inevitably got stuck in a car-box of idiots that couldn't decide what speed they wanted to go, meanwhile obliviously barricading all the other apt drivers... so, of course, here they come again, this time on the right side... and again, I see a 12x12 sheet of paper against the driver's side window, only this time it reads "WE ALWAYS WIN." 
Sureeeee you do Speed Racer... sureeee.... Now, at this point, I had asked Clayton 2 or 3 times to write a rebuttal, but she was too busy being lame, with her 5th grade crush on our 3 boyfriends, to do anything that might make us look "stupid," which apparently included doing what I said and writing down a sassy comeback. So, again, I pass them, and again, they pass us (in the right lane), this time claiming that the "RIGHT LANE ALWAYS WINS." "That's it Clayton! If you don't let me play and make a sign so we can participate I'm going to slap you!"... Well Clayton was so delirious that none of my usually intimidating threats even fazed her, so that was to no avail. Then I,  being the relentless human being that I am, decided it would be a good idea to pull up beside them, roll down my window, and scream "Clayton won't let me play!"... That also was to no avail. This time Clayton said "Shelby, if I write 'Clayton won't let me play' will you be happy?" and I said "Yes!"... I'll take what I can get. 
After they got my message about me being held captive by a fun-Nazi, Clayton and I decided to "throw them a cookie"... literally... Yet again, no avail. The 80 mph wind ate it (that selfish pig).


Unfortunately, even I, with my verbose, overly descriptive writing style, can't adequately convey all of the other ridiculously humorous occurrences of those two days; and I "didn't have a camera by my side this time, hoping I would see the world through both my eyes"... pahahahaha I had to; it was just too perfect to be prideful....

I Can't Fall Asleep To Your Mystery

This weekend I got to spend time with my frustratingly elusive, social butterfly of a friend, Amelia. She and Clayton and I drove around neighboring towns taking pictures of old things and each other, trying to be photographically artistic. We ended up with a few obscene images in the background of some of the pictures thanks to the indiscretions of some local graffiti "artists" and didn't quite make it to all of our anticipated destinations; but nevertheless, it was still a much needed/appreciated day of quality time spent between the "3 best friends that anyone could have" (sorry, I had to).            

I'm obviously not good at not smiling.

                                                                                     
    

     We've all been friends since we were children: Clayton and I, since we were 3 years old; and Amelia and I, since we were in the 6th grade and she asked me to help her run for SGA, which resulted in me reluctantly saying yes because I was too shocked to say no (I hadn't previously had a meaningful conversation with her, that I'm aware of) and then a "spend-the-night-party" where we (and another friend) washed one of her horses and made posters with sayings such as "Vote for A-million-bucks Amelia" and the like... unfortunately, I don't have an eidetic memory, so I can't recall exactly what they said. Anyway, then I spent the night with her again and had a presumably, divinely-intervened "accident" in her bed, to which she reacted like a mom (which would later also become her nickname), put the sheets in the washer, and said we could sleep in the guest bedroom. I don't think she ever told anyone (aside from her mother); and I'm pretty sure I'm the one who brought it up years later with our friends because I thought it was hilarious. I used the phrase "divinely intervened" because that's the only explanation I can think of as to why I would have peed the bed in the sixth grade at a friend's house. We've been friends ever since.

HAH-LARIOUS

        My and Clayton's story is basically this: her mother babysat me and her and another friend while we were in Bright Beginnings and we've been friends on and off ever since. Although, it probably really started in the 5th grade when I allegedly walked up to her and said "I told my momma bout chu!" which was probably provoked by her calling me a buck-toothed weirdo. Some time after that permanently faded from my memory,  began our tumultuous roller-coaster of a friendship that I wouldn't trade for anything.

The title of this post (which has nothing to do with anything I've written in it) is from the song "Cold December" by Matt Costa... andddd it's awesome.

And lastly, an update on my crafty crafts:

That is the bracelet I made for
Hannah and my window which
is basically done until I decide
to hang it in my apartment next
year and string pictures on it.