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| From the beautiful scenery |
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| To the beautiful people. |
We also stopped at "the biggest Flea market" in Sweetwater, TN... the most awesome place on earth. Clayton and I got some Hunter rain boots for 30$ along with some Johnny Cash memorabilia (i.e. 2 t-shirts and an original concert poster), almost gave into my attraction to pocket knives (they were only 15$!!!), and were momentarily debilitated by tantalizing kiosks lined with cages full of puppies and signs reading "Do not touch!" as if to say "Look... the only way you're going to get to touch one of these adorable puppies is if you buy one."... On the way out, we noticed a kiosk with a plethora of reading glasses from the 80s and decided to try on a few pairs. I'm pretty sure I found the exact pair my dad has...
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| FYI: The tiny sign above that pair of glasses says "New Style" |
For this next recap you're going to have to use your imagination as I do not have any visual aids in the form of pictures to document it. So sorry.... Anyway, also on the way home, we were inadvertently caravanning with some of our newly made friends (they wooed us with their dancing) after a brunch at the Cracker Barrel (or as I like to refer to it, Crackel Barrel) in Chattanooga, when all of the sudden I see a vaguely familiar, white, mid-sized sedan creeping up beside mine at 80 mph on the interstate. So, Clayton and I look to our left to send some spontaneous gesture to our new boyfriends, and instead, find that they (being boys, from Mars or wherever) were not surprisingly on a completely different page. They had contrived another means of communication in the form of a hand-made sign plastered to their passenger's side window that reads "LEFT LANE ALWAYS."...
This just validated my deeply subconscious suspicions that this was a race. Oh, it's on little boys... it's on. Needless to say, my innately superior driving skills quickly pulled us back into first place, leaving the Tokyo Drift team in the dust... for a little while, until I inevitably got stuck in a car-box of idiots that couldn't decide what speed they wanted to go, meanwhile obliviously barricading all the other apt drivers... so, of course, here they come again, this time on the right side... and again, I see a 12x12 sheet of paper against the driver's side window, only this time it reads "WE ALWAYS WIN."
Sureeeee you do Speed Racer... sureeee.... Now, at this point, I had asked Clayton 2 or 3 times to write a rebuttal, but she was too busy being lame, with her 5th grade crush on our 3 boyfriends, to do anything that might make us look "stupid," which apparently included doing what I said and writing down a sassy comeback. So, again, I pass them, and again, they pass us (in the right lane), this time claiming that the "RIGHT LANE ALWAYS WINS." "That's it Clayton! If you don't let me play and make a sign so we can participate I'm going to slap you!"... Well Clayton was so delirious that none of my usually intimidating threats even fazed her, so that was to no avail. Then I, being the relentless human being that I am, decided it would be a good idea to pull up beside them, roll down my window, and scream "Clayton won't let me play!"... That also was to no avail. This time Clayton said "Shelby, if I write 'Clayton won't let me play' will you be happy?" and I said "Yes!"... I'll take what I can get.
After they got my message about me being held captive by a fun-Nazi, Clayton and I decided to "throw them a cookie"... literally... Yet again, no avail. The 80 mph wind ate it (that selfish pig).
Unfortunately, even I, with my verbose, overly descriptive writing style, can't adequately convey all of the other ridiculously humorous occurrences of those two days; and I "didn't have a camera by my side this time, hoping I would see the world through both my eyes"... pahahahaha I had to; it was just too perfect to be prideful....
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